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the dirty mirrori will run in to
a kid who sold me pot
when i was sixteen-

he will be-
a devil in a magazine,
a flu-struck hand of January

name? the same, but
a commodore of industry
a peaceless bastard. green-graced sleep

the trivia of time-
has fucked me from behind
i will search, but never find
and dream... but nevermind-
will reach, but cease to climb,
will fight, and lose my mind
will look, but see i'm blind-

and i will burn.
but never shine-

if people didn't filter their emotions and justthrowing yourself on
floors doesn't fix anything,
but it sure seems to.

inferiori don't know how to talk to you. it is like
being in second grade again but trying to understand algebra
because i always liked letters better than numbers but
that doesn't mean they ever made any sense (they didn't)
if you could teach me, maybe, reach me somehow or make it an option -
there are never any options anymore. i miss the numbers on doors
that never reached over two dozen because we didn't need that many
but now there are numbers reaching up to the hundreds
and casing children behind them that have their own doors, some
locked and others torn off their hinges, some with keyholes
and others without handles, not meant to be opened.
none of them go anywhere and that's not the important part but
i could never pinpoint what it was even if i wanted to.
something about you and your plots of running away or tempting death
by your own hand or changing your name and your hair and your face
to face the indifference of passing days on a regular basis.
you always seem to be searching for

081012this is the kind of music you
dance around in your underwear to
at four in the morning drinking
raspberry vodka and spilling it
sticky sweet on bare feet
and staining the dress you neglect-
ed, silk slick
on wooden floors

Chadi remember chad.
he was bigger, all the way around. there was more of him than i was used to.

what i was used to: skinny drug addicts

chad had a little girl. chad had a little house. chad had a little car. chad had me.
when i was with him, when i was his, i thought he had a little life. because everything he owned was miniscule, or damaged.
miniscule: his child, her fingers barely making it around my wrist.
damaged: me, my heart still in tennessee, and nowhere close to being my own again.

i felt bad for chad.

but i could barely speak, and i think he might have liked that.
chad had to listen to people all day long. his boss, his mothe

Anagapesis.Early morning;
white china flies by my head
and I roll my tongue around the hairpin
bend for

'I love you'
over
'I wish you were dead.'

fragment 1for natalie -

sorry you had to
see that.

chronolgical orderfor the life of me I
could never keep a journal for
more than a month, but
I don't mind much
because you could read everything
I've written, the fiction and
truth and the
in between,
and see the slow and
steady deterioration
of a girl
jaded

remindersand,
hey,
it's okay
to run sometimes
too:
even when it's
in your nature
to fight,
and no -
running is not always
cowardice,
know
it's often
brave.

well i'm here and now whati've got all this alcohol and nothing
to light on fire,
so i suppose
i'll just have to
drink it.
and i've got
all this gasoline and
nowhere to go,
so i suppose
i'll just have to
drink that,
too.

the seconds moved slower than the hourssitting on my windowsill
with the glass pushed all the way
up, screen off,
there is enough wind
that if you close your eyes
it will take you to
the ocean for
just a moment.

i've never understood small talkwe met between cars on a train.
i'm sorry but i don't think i caught your name-
there may have been hellos,
the usual
formalities, but
i don't remember. all i know is
that you were headed home
and i was trying to find
one, and
it all felt so very fitting,
at the time.
i'd been seeking solace
in people, not
places,
the way it should be and now
i was lost
it was
empty.
you had these
mint green eyes;
such a soft shock from
the darkness i was used to
suffocating
in - such brevity in
the spaces between glances
the look over your shoulder when
you swore i fucking felt it
too, and
i can promise you that is the last time
i'll ever let someone like that
go
without saying a word, but
you were too good
to be
dragged down
with me.

repercussions 1see the thing is that
nobody ever thinks their
taste in music is
bad.
nobody ever
finds themselves
on the wrong side of the war
if they're still
fighting.
the only time it ever
happens
is
if there is no way
out.

on being and belonging toi hate that to other people,
there is no
'me'. it is always
'you and z',
it is always 'us',
it is always 'we'.
not to say
that being with someone for so long
doesn't make them a part of you,
(because it does),
but it doesn't make you
the same person.
last time i checked,
i still have a cunt between my legs
& flowers in my hair, though
wilted & bloomed again into
something else entirely.
last time i checked i still sleep alone
most nights, and the earth doesn't crumble
beneath my feet and the sea and the moon
don't sway from their keep if i am seen
without him, and the bones
in my spine and the beat
in my heart do not
dissipate if i seem steady
as a girl belonging to no one
body mind & tongue
of her own.

countingshit
shit, I

two fifths of vodka for the crowd
a pair of crystalline relationships evolving:
the one descending and the other rising

things are going to come to a head

I can't do anything for your third suicidal crisis but sit and tell you you're beautiful from far away
I can't do nothing for you

climbing my own ladder, I can't do--

shit,
shit I

those hips

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another relationship poemby ~gogocherryrose

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Submitted on: January 1
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Given 2013-02-11

another relationship poem by ~gogocherryrose is "a complete thought, a complete image" (suggester's words). ( Suggested by `tiganusi and Featured by ^neurotype )

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~BluestWaves Mar 10, 2013

yes

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~gogocherryrose Mar 10, 2013

no!

lol

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~BluestWaves Mar 11, 2013

hahahaha

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~gogocherryrose Mar 11, 2013

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*UnspecifiedUnknown Feb 13, 2013 Writer

^{congrats love
this is simple, but beautiful, and full}

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~gogocherryrose Feb 22, 2013

thank you

xo

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=Wordeea Feb 13, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

that is so perfect. congrats again ! well deserved

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~gogocherryrose Feb 13, 2013

Thanks

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=KissTheSunrise Feb 13, 2013

Congrats on the DD!! beautiful poem of losing love.

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~gogocherryrose Feb 13, 2013

Thanks cuteness

PS - I'm still waiting for my V-Day card shark biatch.

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